He Never Could
by janabananah
Summary: Surprise! Rangiku fell in love.
1. Chapter 1

**A/N-SO, CYGOS REQUESTED SOME MORE HITSU/MATSU GOODNESS...AND I WAS HAPPY TO OBLIGE. AS CYGOS SAID, RANGIKU AND TOSHIRO CAN ONLY AVOID THE BIG PINK ELEPHANT IN THE CORNER FOR SO LONG. HE HE HE...ISN'T THAT THE TRUTH? I AM THINKING THIS IS A ONE-SHOT UNLESS THERE IS A REQUEST FOR ELABORATION ON THEIR RENDEZVOUS. DO YOU THINK RANGIKU WOULD KEEP THE PINK ELEPHANT AS A PET? HMMMM...OH, AND I DON'T OWN THE CHARACTERS, JUST THE STORIES WITHIN...LIKE YOU DIDN'T ALREADY KNOW.**

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**HE NEVER COULD**

The party was over all too soon. It made me sad to watch the balloons that used to float through the air on a helium high, droop with despair. It was like they were reading my mind. I gathered my hair and threw it up in to a half bun. I just need the hair out of my face as I stripped the conference room of all of the decorations that I had hung.

It was a momentous occasion. Everyone in Seireitei had a reason to celebrate; it had been ten years since we had overthrown Aizen. But no one had more of a reason to reflect than those of us that were directly involved: Rukia, Renji, Ikkaku, Yamichka, Izuru, Shuhei, Nanao, My Captain, Captains Kyoraku and Ukitake and little old me. I hoped everyone enjoyed themselves. I hoped everyone was able to take a small trip out of the moment and forget the pain that was still settled in their hearts.

"Yeah, right." I laughed mockingly at myself as a tear splashed off of the ground. Who am I kidding? I may have everyone fooled but I can't lie to the fractured half-beats of my broken heart. They say time heals everything. That is not entirely true. Ten years had barely put a dent in my pain and I was beginning to think it was permanently affixed to my soul. I tried my best to cover it up with laughter and alcohol. Perhaps I didn't try hard enough.

"You sure do know how to throw a party." A voice said behind me; catching me off guard. I reached up to dry my eyes with my sleeve before I stood up and collected the empty cups that lined the floor. I thought everyone had left. Why was he still here? Damn it. "But you forgot one minor detail." He explained.

I faked a smile as I tried to walk past him without making eye contact. "Oh, yeah? What's that?" I asked with a counterfeit laugh. As I tried to walk by his hand lashed out and took a hold of my arm. The jolt of his touch caused me to look at him involuntarily. I was caught. "You forgot to enjoy _yourself_."

In that instant I realized how handsome he had become. Age made his face swell with maturity, made his shoulders broader and believe it or not, it made him wiser. My words no longer left him abashed. I found he was no longer the stoic boy he used to be. He was learning to be 

comfortable in his own skin. He was a man now. And was he ever a man. I watched his eyebrows frown when he saw my bloodshot eyes.

"Rangiku? What's the matter? What happened?" He questioned as he pulled me in for a hug. His embrace caused my composure to crack and I began to sob uncontrollably. "There, there." He reached up to run his fingers through my hair. I fought a loosing battle to stifle my shuddering breaths and he tightened his hold. The closer he pulled me into him the more my crying progressed. I mentally cursed myself for my weakness. How could I let this happen?

When my tears subsided I wiped my eyes in my sleeve. I leaned into his embrace and snaked my arms around his neck. I could feel his hot breaths on my neck as I took a long, deep breath to take in his scent. He smelt refreshing, like a waterfall. I secretly wanted him to wash me clean. It was a secret I'd never tell.

"Why do you still let him get to you?" He whispered in my ear. My Captain surely was a genius. He always knew how to read my most intimate thoughts. It was irritating. I let out an exasperated sigh. "Let him go. A flower should not weep for the bad seed. You are free now to blossom on your own accord. You don't need him to care for you. You are the strongest woman I know. It breaks my heart to see you this way, Rangiku. Let-him-go." He reached up to take a hold of my face. My blurry eyes met his. His face held understanding and kindness that I seldom saw in him. In that instant I realized that the strings of my heart were woven in his love. The strings were so deeply stitched that I feared that pulling away from him would pull my heart out of my chest. All these years? Why didn't I feel it before? This startling revelation shook my entire being. My eyes fell to the floor I love Toshiro Hitsugaya.

My heart bleeds for everyone I come in contact with. Life is such a cruel journey. My pain is nothing compared to others. He was wasting his time on me. I did not deserve his kindness.

"Surely, you are hurting too." I declared; eyes still focused on the floor.

My Captain grabbed my shoulders and shook me hard one time. "Don't change the subject. This is about you!" He proclaimed in an elevated voice. I looked at him with wide eyes. He was showing me a different side of himself. A side I had never seen. Before I could say anything I felt my insides explode when he pressed his lips to mine. He was the most delicious thing I had ever tasted; like vanilla ice cream. My knees buckled under the weight of his kiss and I fell into him. I gripped his robes as hard as I could. His kisses trailed down my neck as my leg snaked around his hip. His touch was calming as he explored my thigh. My brain told me to stop but everything else said "to hell with it."

"I love you." He said almost inaudibly causing me to freeze in shock. "Everything in my life has led me back to you."

I pulled away from him and walked across the room. I leaned against the wall and contemplated the situation.

"Rangiku? Are you mad?" He approached me cautiously.

I let out a small laugh. "No. I am not mad. I am overjoyed." I explained.

"But?..."

"But…What are we going to do now that we have fallen in love? People are going to think we are ridiculous. They will say that I am some hussy that is out to seduce every man in Seireitei, even my own Captain. Then they will congratulate you behind closed doors for being associated with the court seductress. Are you willing to damage your reputation?"

He walked to me with exaggerated steps until his face was a mere 6 inches from mine. One of his arms found its way to my hip and held me close while the other rested upon the wall, next to my head. I felt his breath as he spoke. "Fuck 'em." The tone in his voice shook my bones. "You do not damage my reputation. They are just jealous. It doesn't take a genius to figure out 

that you're beautiful inside and out. You deserve to be indulged. Let me indulge you. Let me taste you. Let me…love you the way he never could."


	2. Chapter 2

**A/N-SO…I AM A LIAR. THIS ISN'T A ONE-SHOT IS IT? LOL. UMMM…****Kohryu**** CAME UP WITH THE IDEA OF THE STORY BEING TOLD FROM HITSUGAYA'S POV. IT WAS A VERY GOOD IDEA. WISH I HAD THOUGHT OF IT. I WAS JUST GOING TO CONTINUE THE STORY. IT WAS A BIT OF A CHALLENGE FOR ME BECAUSE EVERYTHING I WRITE IS USUALLY FROM RANGIKU'S POV...BUT I NEVER BACK DOWN FROM A CHALLENGE. ANYWAY…I DON'T OWN THE CHARACTERS…JUST THE STORIES WITHIN…LIKE YOU DIDN'T ALREADY KNOW. **

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The party ended when the food was gone and the music had died down. We had such a wonderful hostess. She is kind and considerate of her guests. She made sure their cups were full and offered endless conversation. Sure she mingled and laughed but her heart was not there. The usual twinkle in her eyes was not to be found. She tried hard to cover up the turmoil she was feeling. But I knew it must have been a hard day for her. The reminiscing was too much to bear for all of us but she still holds herself partly responsible. A fact I hoped to remedy. I wanted to make every ounce of her pain disappear just as the man who caused it.

I watched her from the doorway as she pinned her hair up and began to disassemble the decorations from the conference room. I had so much to tell her and no better time to tell her in. It doesn't matter whether she is in the heat of battle, primping herself or cleaning up after a party. She is always beautiful. "Yeah, right." I heard her say as she removed some streamers from the window sill. Then she laughed. It wasn't her usual happy laugh, though. It was a laugh filled with anger, bitterness and regret. She was crying.

"You sure do know how to throw a party." I said as I walked up behind her and she jumped. She hadn't realized I had been there. Slowly she stood up holding the trash at her feet. "But you forgot one minor detail."

"Oh, yeah. What's that?" She asked as she tried to push past me. I refused to allow her by. I took a hold of her arm and she looked at me surprised. Her face was red and puffy. Her eyes were swollen and wet. Yet in her sadness her beauty never faltered. It's angelic the way her hair is like a waterfall of red and blonde as the waves trickle down her back. Sure the curves of her body are delicious but the curves of her heart are what draw me to her.

"You forgot to enjoy _yourself_." I insisted. Her eyes searched my face as I searched hers. I don't understand why more people can't see what a treasure she is. Why can't some one make her happy the way that she tries to make everyone else happy? I had grown to love her. Why couldn't she see that? He is long gone and still he holds on to her heart with unwavering fervor. I looked over her with confusion. Why can't she let him go?

"Rangiku? What's the matter? What happened?" I pulled her in for a hug and she let her composure go. It was painful for me to watch her be in so much pain. "There, there." I tried my best to comfort her and I ran my fingers through her hair; avoiding the pins. Her breaths became ragged and I pulled her closer to me in an attempt to absorb her suffering. I nestled her under my chin. I held her there until she stopped crying. She reached up and wrapped her arms around my neck and took a deep breath. I could smell the fragrance of her shampoo. It was intoxicating. I felt me knees go weak. "Why do you still let him get to you?" I whispered in her ear. She let out a sharp sigh. "Let him go. A flower should not weep for the bad seed. You are free now to blossom on your own accord. You don't need him to care for you. You are the strongest woman I know. It breaks my heart to see you this way, Rangiku. Let-him-go."

I took her face in my hands and contemplated what I could say to her to make her understand that she was wasting her tears. The aching in my heart grew to a size that I could no longer contain. I loved her. Had she always loved me?

"Surely, you are hurting too." She explained. It's just like her to bypass my efforts to cheer her up in order to make light of her own feelings. Why was she so terrified of letting her true feelings be known?

I shook her one time to snap her out of her selfless state. "Don't change the subject. This is about you!" I shouted. My next move was involuntary and more irrational than I intended to be. I pressed my lips to hers. Her lips were smooth like velvet and she melted into me. I didn't want that feeling to end. Now that I had her undivided attention I let my lips travel down her neck. Much to my delight she wrapped a leg around my hip. I wasted no time admiring the feel of her skin. I had to tell her. "I love you. Everything in my life has led me back to you."

With my words she pulled away from me and rested herself against the wall on the other side of the room. She looked at me pensively.

"Rangiku? Are you mad?" I asked as the fear built up in my stomach. She chucked at my question.

"No. I am not mad. I am overjoyed." She began but stopped short of her explanation.

"But?..." I insisted.

"But…What are we going to do now that we have fallen in love?" I couldn't believe that she just said that she loved me! I was the happiest man in the world. "People are going to think we are ridiculous. They will say that I am some hussy that is out to seduce every man in Seireitei, even my own Captain. Then they will congratulate you behind closed doors for being associated with the court seductress. Are you willing to damage your reputation?"

I walked to her in wide steps and still getting to her took way too long. I placed an arm on the wall and curled another arm around her waist. She would not escape me. I spoke loudly and vigorously. "Fuck 'em. You do not damage my reputation. They are just jealous. It doesn't take a genius to figure out that you're beautiful inside and out. You deserve to be indulged. Let me indulge you. Let me taste you. Let me…love you the way he never could."


End file.
